Archive for February, 2018

going to hell, pt. 1

February 28, 2018

many years ago tonight
darkness as my only light
did i steal away to hell
but till now, did never tell

witness to a private game
one whose most disturbing aim
did the players, stranger still
use to toy with human will

death, the devil, and a kid
each picked names and placed a bid
marked their arrows with a seal
meant to consecrate their deal

and upon this wicked pact
each performed a sacred act
till the kid, now winged and blind
was these arrows so assigned

i might not have ever learned
what this little game concerned
but that night, he shot me through
i saw him, and he shot you

that’s the night that we first met
so not fate, but cupid’s bet
brought us love so long ago
though i never told you so

yes, i knew it was a lie
and knew how – although not why
but i wanted what it bought
with no care for what it wrought

never thinking once of you
or the pain you might go through
till tonight, a single tear
proves its price too high, too dear

and my sin, i do confess
one of seeking to possess
what is never truly owned
but, through love, is simply loaned

death, i think, you win the bet
hell, take me and my regret
save what cupid earned in part
what remains of my sad heart

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2.15.18

February 15, 2018

i cried so much yesterday
no more tears have i today
no more sadness, no more pain
numb to all my thoughts sustain

for a moment, drawing breath
contemplating life and death
everything, it all turned on
shots rang out, and all was gone

in this void, we’ll hold debate
face a fiend, his gun, his hate
find a cause, impose a cost
and say prayers for those we’ve lost

though it cannot right this wrong
let it help those hurt be strong
give us faith and peace of mind
as true justice be inclined

and when we recall those felled
take us to those thoughts first held
of what we ourselves would give
for this gift we have to live

how i saved valentine’s day

February 12, 2018

and so here i was with the goddess of love
having been invited – no doubt by the devil
to debate the merits of this february holiday
which venus now considered an abomination

the problem is, she said, cupid drinks too much
and valentine, he just doesn’t care anymore
he thinks it’s funny, all these mismatches
what’s done on this day is an absolute disgrace

i had to disagree, having already bought flowers
i thought a card and candy was a very nice idea
you know, a way to tell someone they’re special
without saying too much, sort of ‘break the ice’

‘break the ice’? she sneered, what a pitiful term
do you want the girl? would you not profess it?
if you like someone, if you want something
speak to your desire with passionate words!

i had to explain such behavior was improper
women are not ‘girls’ or spoken to that way
and decency, and civility, were the new order
replacing the oft abusive conduct of the past

oh dear god, i didn’t say assault the girl…
i said speak to her…and with some intention!
are you saying no one does that anymore?
no wonder cupid is drinking so heavily today

candidly, i was inclined to agree with her
but her accusatory tone so provoked me
my mind raced to humanity’s first impulse
and a surprising defense of modern mores

in the midst of it all, i found myself moved
ably illustrating the potential power of words
of that unsolicited, unwanted message
on the life, spirit, and ambitions of another

venus stood intently silent as i outlined my case
upon my conclusion, she seemed near tears
which flowed freely – as she burst into laughter
so violently, she nearly choked trying to respond

enough, she finally said, you can keep your day
but let’s be clear – your clever ‘wording’ aside
this price you set, and pay, for words themselves
it suggests the gift of language is lost on you

it is not the words – it is their ideas that matter
you prize the symbols, but miss their meaning
if i insult you for who you are, what is that?
is it not an admission i fear you may be more?

yes, i will concede some ideas are dangerous
but the danger lies in the speaker’s small mind
and in the actions of the equally small-minded
love is not small, it is infinite, and it prevails

while her speech was truly mesmerizing
the point, of course, is that i saved the day
or maybe that my original opinion was correct
or whatever you say when bested by a goddess

and goddess she was – a stunning ageless beauty
which i tried to overlook, or avoid drooling over
but now, debate completed, i was falling apart
“so…well…i…i have these flowers for you…”