Archive for August, 2013

the queen of mean

August 22, 2013

she’s the very queen of mean
a vicious bitch, a wicked shrew
and while you’ve done a brilliant job
she’ll fault the work as well as you

for she’s the brightest, she’s the best
and none had best dispute it
God himself could say she’s erred
and He would be refuted

your surgery, your holiday
your family’s plans can wait
unless she’s got a speech to give
you’d better not be late

she’ll tell you of humility
of kindness, patience, grace
and endless genius she has shown
though most see only failed disgrace

the empty promise a of life
imbued with talent, skill
who somehow lost her self-esteem
replacing it with boastful will

sadly, reason’s left the room
the situation’s just obscene
all that’s left to do is curse
when you’re hailed to see the queen


reality shows

August 22, 2013

everything is easier
though much of it is wrong
everything is faster now
though we wait twice as long

everyone is very smart
but none have learned to think
save those few who notice
that the system’s out of sync

so here comes honey boo boo
there goes the evening news
but for fashion, gossip
and some pundit’s pointed views 

and i, i wind my watch
to a sun, a moon, and stars
whose zenith, some day waning
knows no greater fate than ours

ode to country music

August 6, 2013

this crazy broad, she wrecked my house
she took my dog, my truck
i’ve gone insane
but can’t complain
she’s brought me such good luck

she lied in church, in Jesus’ name
she set the flag on fire
then drunk on wine
spilled beer of mine
but she sure can inspire

she proves the point that ugliness
sinks deep into one’s bones
her thick moustache
conceals a rash
yet all I want she owns

she stole my very heart and soul
then slept with all my friends
my hell–spawned brat
she left me flat
though fate has made amends

for all she is and all she’s done
and though I suffered long
she was the blight
that helped me write
the perfect country song